Big Changes!

In my last post, several months ago, I told you all that I was looking to reinter the workforce.  I'd applied for several part time positions and had ZERO response.  Then I saw a full time position in my town's Public Works Department, and applied on a whim.  Well within 2 days I got a call back, followed by an interview on a Thursday morning, job offer by Thursday afternoon and I started working within a week.

My hours are supposed to be Monday-Friday, 8am until 4:30pm, but there's only been 2 or 3 times that I've gotten out of the office on time.  By the end of my second week, the office manager announced that she's already targeted me to be her replacement when she retires in three years.  

We shall see how this all goes.  I do like the co-workers, and I meet some REALLY "interesting" people. The family is adjusting and helping pick up the slack around the house.  The dog seems to be taking my absence the hardest. so he's my shadow when I am home.

In other news, Lindsey turned 18!  It's hard to believe the "baby" is now an adult.  She's been doing a lot of house/pet/farm sitting and has a new thing where she's milking a couple of cows pretty regularly for a family that's traveling.  All this in addition to her position at the museum.   She finished a new 1850's outfit for herself and has a little traveling to Renaissance Faire's with a couple of co-workers.

Olivia's career is thriving.  She's gone for the next several weeks, floating between several horse training centers while the owners are traveling to shows and vacations.   She's also planning her next big trip.  She's heading to Israel in March 2024.

I hope you've had a great summer!  It's hard to believe we're in September!

Fall Has Arrived

Even though fall arrived a couple of weeks ago on the calendar, it's been a bit slower going in our weather.  We did have a teaser early on and then the high temps and humidity roared back in.

Saturday we  woke up to much cooler weather (like a 25 degree drop from Friday), and after our volleyball game and lunch we headed out to meet my brother at the pumpkin patch.   The weather was perfect, cool and crisp.   Neither girl listened when I said wear pants not shorts, they regretted this decision after being out in the patch for a while.  Like my Momma used to say, "When you don't listen, you have to feel."

 

Sunday morning we woke up to our first frost of the year!   Talk about a big change in a 48 hour period.  Nobody balked when I said put on pants and a jacket before heading out to church.

Monday was another beautiful fall day.   I swapped out Lindsey's summer clothing for her fall stash.   I'll work on Olivia's later on, as she tends to wear shorts later into the fall due to sports.  I also put some fall decorations in the front yard, and changed my big garden flag (which I forgot to take a photo of).  I need to buy a couple of mums when I'm out and about this week.

I've not taken many photos of my gardens this year, not sure why, it just didn't happen.   So here are a few of the remaining plants.   My asters are stunning, and have multiplied a great deal since last year.

 A few of my Zinnias are still holding on to the very end.   This is probably my favorite type of annual, they produce such a wide variety of colors and height in the garden.

 Nothing at all "homeschool" related in this post....just "home", and I'm good with that.   Do you decorate for fall/harvest at your  house?

Life Outside the Box

Lindsey is a gadget girl.   She's smitten with any new gadget that comes out.   That doesn't mean she owns any of these gadgets, but she finds out about them and then pines away hoping to one day be the proud owner of said gadget.  

My husbands company, in an attempt to promote healthier employees, started a walking program complete with free pedometers for employers and their families.   Imagine Lindsey's glee when she was handed her own gadget.   It's not the Fit-Bit she's been salivating over, but it'll do.   She's been wearing it every day, tracking her steps and feeling a bit superior to her sister, who has yet to remove hers from the little box it came in.

 

Last week there was an interesting conversation between the two.  Lindsey was really giving Olivia a hard time over not using her pedometer.   Then Olivia said something profound, "My life doesn't fit inside your little red box."   I thought that was pretty deep and I've been thinking on it ever since, identifying areas that need to be freed from the box.

Even in our homeschooling we tend to think inside the box.  Today I encourage you to resist the urge to box your child into a certain curriculum,  method of schooling or career track.   Allow for room and life outside the box in their lives, and yours!  Watch the beauty of a life lived unfold, with or without counting each step.

2017-The Year of the Do-Over

The girls received several cool games for Christmas, the type of game where you have to have skill, patience and a little bit of luck to win. The youngest had been working on one of her games for quite a while, when she made a mistake that cost her all the work she'd been doing. I heard her call out "REDO!" as she started the whole process over.

It was right about here that my adult mind grasped a child like truth, we can get a "redo". Now granted there are some things you just can't redo (death and taxes come to mind). However, every morning when we wake up, we get a redo...an opportunity to make today better than yesterday. As you have probably guessed by now, my word for 2017 is REDO!!

I want to redo a few areas of my life.  I'm already working towards a thinner, healthier me.   I want to redo one more room here in the house that I haven't made over, and touch up a few that I have already worked on.   I want to get a redo on relationships and spend more time with actual people and less time reading about people online.

I want to take advantage of every day, as an opportunity to improve on the day before, and take advantage of every REDO I'm afforded.

Linking up with Word for the Year 2017!

The Blue Dye Crisis - 2016

Have you ever been doing something, and, as if in slow motion, you see the whole thing go horribly awry??  Picture if you will, a peaceful Saturday evening, a bottle of permanent blue hair dye and a white kitchen floor.  Let that picture formulate for a few seconds before I tell my story.

First off, for those of you who KNOW me (not just read my blog from afar), you'll see that this was a real live Christmas miracle in the making.   For those of you who read my blog, but have never spent actual time with me, I'll give you some background.

1.  I may be a bit OCD.  I like my house clean, and I like things tidy and orderly.  I don't like messes.
2.  I can be a bit of a control freak, because in controlling my surroundings, it helps me keep the beast inside calm and serene.
3.  When #2 above fails, I can quickly go into a full blown rage (I kid you not), ahem.

So yeah, there I am all calm and quiet preparing to touch up the faded blue in my daughter's hair.  I've done this before.  I've made sure the floor where we are working is covered, because the box CLEARLY states that the dye will stain floors, counters, clothing, etc.

Now, I don't have carpal tunnel, nor do I have hand tremors or any other issue with my hands.  Imagine my surprise, as I'm using the squirt bottle to add the ELECTRIC BLUE dye to Olivia's hair, when suddenly, for some unknown reason, the bottle goes flying out of my hand and ACROSS the kitchen; and in doing so, somehow creates not one, not two but THREE semi-circles of electric blue hair dye across my white floor and up the side of the grey wall of my kitchen.

It was at this point that the Lord Himself must have intervened as I stood there, slack jaw and agape looking at what we have since dubbed "the incident".   Had the dye been red, it truly would have looked like a CSI crime scene.   I didn't lose my temper...not even a wee little bit.   I'm telling you folks, it's the 2016 Christmas Miracle, and I'm not EVEN kidding.

I called for backup from child #2, asking for paper towels, then bleach, then more paper towels.  I was left with blue stained flooring, from one side of the kitchen to the other.  No throw rug could cover this area.  (I didn't even think to take a photo!)

I stood there looking at the floor blankly, at a total loss of what to do, when a scripture flashed across my mind.   If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all men liberally, and reproaches not; and it shall be given him.  James 1:5 

At this point the kids are both just looking at me, probably waiting for the volcano to erupt.  So I said out loud "God, you said to ask for wisdom..and I don't know what to do.  What will take this stain out of my flooring?"    Just as quickly as the scripture reference had crossed my mind seconds before, the answer came.   A brillo pad and warm water.

I sat down in the middle of the floor with a brillo pad and a bowl of warm water and began to go in little circles.   As I scrubbed, the stain began to lift, and as the stain lifted I started thanking God, out loud for His wisdom.   Now, whether a brillo pad really will take a stain up, or if this was Divine Intervention, I don't know, but 90 minutes later my floor is again white, with the exception of one small, light gray smudge.

Now, go back and read the part about the bottle flying across the room, and laugh a good hard belly laugh as you envision it.  I can't image what it would have looked like had it been caught on camera, but I'd bet in slow motion it would have been a youtube hit!

Choosing to Be Thankful

In the American culture, the month of November is synonymous with Thanksgiving.   Not in giving thanks, but in the decadent meal prepared on the fourth Thursday in November.   We all have our favorite dish, or favorite Thanksgiving memory. It’s as American as apple pie (or in November, pumpkin pie).

If you use social media during the month of November you’ll see people participating in “Thankfulness Challenges”, and most of those posting are patting someone else on the back for being so good.   I never participate in those challenges, and people get all up in the air with me, and I’m ok with that.

What ever happened to being thankful, in the small things and the great, without being called on the carpet on social media sites?   Lest you think I’m pointing fingers, let me just say that I can be VERY guilty of being ungrateful.   Like many of you, I get so wrapped up in the cares of life that it’s easy to look at the things I don’t have and to become discontent and ungrateful.

In direct contrast to my above statement about thankfulness challenges, I’m going to issue one myself.   But I don’t want it to be posted for all the world to see. I don’t even want you to tell your friends and family.   What I’m going to challenge you (and me) with, is to intentionally give thanks to God in the midst of our circumstances.

If you’re wiping grimy hand prints off the refrigerator door for the umpteenth time, stop and thank God that He has blessed you with healthy, active, vibrant children who are capable of leaving handprints around the house.

In the midst of trying to figure out what to fix for dinner, thank God that you have food in the house, enough so that you are forced to decide which thing to choose for that day.   Thank Him that your babies will be going to bed with a full stomach, even if it is left over meatloaf.

In the midst of complaining about your husband’s shortcomings, STOP and thank God that He’s given you a husband who is faithful, supportive and who still finds you attractive in sweatpants and a ponytail .
We all face many things each day.   Deliberately look for opportunities to be thankful, and express that thankfulness to God. You’ll find that if you focus on being thankful, you’ll be far more content in life.

Let’s try to carry this practice with us past November and into the craziness of life. Thanksgiving should be a way of life, not just a meal in November.

Changing Seasons

It’s officially fall here in Virginia. The days are cool and crisp, leaves are beautifully painted reds and golds and the produce stands are full or pumpkins and apples. Everywhere you look there are harvest parties and fall festivals. Farmers are storing up feed and hay to feed to their livestock during the winter. Homemakers are pickling and canning the last of the garden bounty. Pumpkin recipes are everywhere! Despite all the fun things, fall is still a season of preparation for the upcoming deadness of winter.

I’m also sensing that this is a time of spiritual preparation as well. God is calling people to spend more time studying the scriptures, praying, and fellowshipping with Him on a daily basis. These cool mornings are the perfect time for a cup of hot tea or coffee, a cozy blanket and some alone time with the Scriptures.

I don’t feel that this season of spiritual preparation is because there’s a spiritual “winter” on the way, but rather because there’s a time of advancement, growth, and ministry opportunities getting ready to open up like never before. The harvest truly is great, but the reapers and workers must be ready.

In order to spend time in the Word and in prayer, we will need to make time in our schedules. Quit being so busy with “life” that you forget to spend time with God and receive the Breath of Life that He gives. This might mean sacrificing some sleep and getting up early, before the pitter patter of little feet hit the floor. Perhaps you need to turn off the computer, smart phone or other electronic gadget and disconnect from technology on a regular basis, as you reconnect with the Creator.

You might say “But I don’t have time to do that…I have such a long list to get done today.” You’re right, you don’t have time, you have to MAKE time. Little elves don’t sneak in overnight and write all those deadlines and obligations on your calendar, you do it. Likewise, little elves won’t come in and block off time to spend in the things of God. You will have to do it, or it won’t get done. Our enemy is smart. If he can’t get you to stop, he’ll get you to accelerate to the point where you burn out and run yourself into the ground. You’re no good to yourself, your family, God or anyone else in that condition.

In the book of Luke chapter 10 we see the story of Mary & Martha. It’s a familiar verse to all of us. Mary was sitting at Jesus’ feet and Martha was busy trying to make dinner for Jesus and the disciples. Finally in frustration, Martha looks at Jesus and says “don’t you care that I’m working and she’s just sitting there doing nothing?” Notice Jesus didn’t scold Mary for not having a to-do list, or for not being a “get it done” kind of gal. Rather, He looked at Martha with compassion, and probably shook His head a bit as He said “Martha, Martha…you’re BUSY and bothered with life. Mary chose the NEEDFUL thing, and it won’t be taken away from her.”

Interestingly enough, you never read again about Jesus having to tell Martha to focus on what was needful. Apparently, she got it the first time. Maybe she was quicker on the uptake than we are? Let’s endeavor to get it this time, and set aside the cares and schedules in exchange for some one on one time with the Creator of heaven and earth. He’s waiting for you.

Just Breathe

I sat in the exam room, waiting patiently for the doctor to return with the results of my EKG. I reflected on the long night that I’d just endured. It’s amazing how something so natural like, oh say, breathing for example, can suddenly without warning become such a struggle.   The air seemed to have turned thick and heavy and only entered the very tops of my lungs as I’d gasped for each breath.

My thoughts were interrupted by the doctor’s return. She seemed a bit surprised to find that my heart was indeed fine. As they set up a breathing treatment to open my airways and provide relief, she asked “Have you had any major life changes or family issues lately?” Um…nothing outside normal life.   She asked for the “Reader’s Digest Condensed Version” of where I am in life, her eyes were ever widening as I spoke.

I sat and puffed on my little peace pipe looking inhaler as she went on to tell me about the dangers of stress.   She seems to think that I may need a break.   The irony being that this all started as I was sitting down, taking a break and relaxing.   She somehow missed the whole part about the itchy eyes, throat, and ears that to me seemed to have pointed to an allergic reaction of some type, but then again, I didn’t graduate from medical school, ahem.

I returned home with a couple of prescriptions and a “slow down” pep talk.   I truly do understand where she’s coming from.   However, I also know that I’m not going to be one of those people who just sits down on the sidelines and watches the game of life pass by.

Life is full of “what if” moments. Some people let those what if’s stop them in their tracks. However, I look at life a bit differently I guess.   What if I live my life to the fullest, impacting my family and friends and the world as much as I can?

Regret and what if run hand in hand. Do the “what if’s” of life stop you, or propel you forward?   It’s your choice. But regardless of which choice you make, remember to breathe! Breathe in the sights, sounds, smells, and relationships around you.

When all else fails, just breathe!

A Dad Worth Remembering

In the past little while, several of my close friends have lost their fathers – some to chronic illness, others to sudden tragedy.  Each of these dear friends has lost a “daddy” -their first true love.   It’s been truly humbling to listen to these women share about the great love and admiration they have for their fathers.   These haven’t been perfect men by any stretch, because none of us are even close to perfection.   Yet in the eyes of their daughters, they are as close to perfection as it gets.   This is truly amazing to me.

My girls are still young, not even teenagers yet.   I see that same adoration in them.  Screeches of “daddy’s home” echo through our house as the door slams and little feet race down the driveway to grab the returning hero at the end of the work day.   A “snuffle” from Daddy at bedtime is a prized commodity and probably holds far more value than all of the vaults at Fort Knox.  Rumor has it that his homemade pizza is the best pizza, EVER!

This is truly a relationship that I can’t quite fathom.    I sometimes stand afar off and watch the three of them as they interact and I wonder what it is that makes that bond  between father and daughter so strong.   Maybe it’s the princess in every little girl, looking for a knight in shining armor?

Whatever it is, I’m happy that my children experience it.   One day (far, far away I hope) they will experience the loss of this first love of theirs.   It will be heart wrenching, but it will be the magnum opus of this man’s life.  His greatest work, to love his children and show them a glimpse of the Father’s love for them.

Dads, they need you.  They need your love.  They need your guidance.  They need your encouragement.  They need your time, your laughter, your snuffles.  Better to be wept for with fondness, than to be wept for with regret.

Changing the Course

Can I be honest with you all? I struggle with Mother’s Day. Not because my mother has passed away, but rather because of the fact that I didn’t grow up with the “June Cleaver” version of a mom.   Here, in my mid-forties (gah!) I still struggle with how to make sense out of my childhood.   I’d be willing to bet that I’m not alone in that struggle.  Can I get an amen, or at least an acknowledging nod?

We all come from different backgrounds, including our mothers.  Believe it or not, your mom (and mine) had a life before becoming someone’s mom.  During those pre-mom years, she walked through many valleys, suffered unspoken wrongs and made mistakes.   Those things shaped her, and ultimately had a hand in shaping you.   If we could look into our mother’s history we might be stunned at what we see, but we might also be a bit more understanding of the quirks that exist in her behavior.

Whether your mom was “June Cleaver” or “Mommy Dearest”, you can look for the good in her.  You can pass those good things on to your children.  Her only redeeming quality may have been her ability to laugh at herself when falling down drunk.  Teach your children to laugh at themselves, and not at each other.   Perhaps your mom was a strict disciplinarian who made you “tow the line” every minute of your childhood.  Teach your children to behave, but grant them grace when they behave like children.

We, as mothers, have the ability to shape and mold the future with the little things we do each day.  It’s our choice which things we allow to go into that shaping and molding.  Let me tell you, it’s flat out HARD to want to respond a certain way, based on your upbringing…but instead you choose to react the right way.   Sometimes we have to draw a line in the sand, and say “No, this behavior, this trait will not be passed on to my children.   I choose to be different.”

Whatever struggle you’re facing today, know that you don’t have to face it alone.  God assures us in Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

The 18 year old daughter of one of my closest friends recently went to jail.  I sent her a note to let her know that I was praying for her, and that this wasn’t the end.   I found myself penning the words “Nothing is wasted if you learn from it, and allow it to point you in the direction you were meant to go.”     Those words are true for us moms as well.   Continue to learn, grow and move in the right direction, and point your kids toward their final Home in all that you do.

Blessings in Disguise

When you think of blessings, you might think of things like a new car, a trip to Hawaii or having a housekeeper (and all the moms say “Amen”!).  While those things are blessings, our biggest and most important blessings are most often little things, wrapped up in the busy-ness of life, instead of colorful paper and a shiny bow.

For example, I give you the month of April, on my calendar.  At first glance, it can appear to be a stressful and expensive month. In addition to our normal life, each year this month contains my birthday, my sister-in-laws birthday, our wedding anniversary, my oldest daughter’s birthday, and my twin great nieces’ birthdays.  In all honesty, I could look at April as being too hectic, too expensive, and a burden; but, if I choose to look at each of the events as the blessing they are, then April becomes an incredible month. Let me show you what I mean.

I turned 48 this year.  F.O.R.T.Y.E.I.G.H.T.  ya’ll. That’s like…old. That’s also 48 years of laughing, crying, and experiencing life. I’ve seen and done things in those 48 years that some people will never see and do (and I’ve lived to tell about it).   Getting older isn’t something to get upset over, it’s a celebration of our lives…and the fact that God in His Mercy kept us safe even when we didn’t know we were in harm’s way.

My oldest daughter turned 13 this year.  Thirteen.  That’s like….old too, but in an “oh my gosh, where did those 13 years go?” type of  old.   She’s turned into a beautiful, thoughtful young lady…but she’s still a little girl, and those two worlds collide and I get to walk it out with her.  It’s hard, ya’ll.  It’s one of my greatest joys.   I didn’t get that opportunity with our first child, so I cherish this time with the ones I do get to see grow.

My twin great-nieces turned 3 this year.   They were born at 28 weeks along, (twenty-eight, that’s LITTLE) with little expectancy to live.  Yet these two beautiful, funny little girls are celebrating three years of life, a life they almost didn’t have.  They are perfectly healthy, strong and incredibly smart.  We celebrate their lives this month.

We were able to attend a first birthday party for another beautiful miracle baby.  The Momma had undergone years of  fertility treatments with no success.  The doctors finally told her that she cannot have children.  After finally giving up on having her own child, she and her husband began the long and expensive process of adoption.  In the midst of all this, she became really sick.  Thinking she had the flu, she went to the doctor to find that what she had was MORNING SICKNESS that lasted all day for weeks on end.   You’ve never seen anyone as happy to be sick in your life!

My husband and I celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary this year.  We’ve been through a lot in those 15 years.  We’ve gained family and friends, and lost family and friends.  We’ve built a life and a home together.  It’s not always been easy, but here we are still standing together.  We don’t look like any of those TV couples, and we’re ok with that.

Life if full of “stuff”.  Choosing to see the blessings, in the midst of the all the stuff is completely up to you.

Every Day Love

Do you remember back when you were single and Valentine’s Day would be the one day out of the year that would either make you the happiest gal on earth or a blubbering wreck sobbing in the corner?   Maybe Valentine’s Day still has that affect on you.  For most of us, we’ve realized that “love” isn’t something that’s expressed just on February 14 with a box of chocolates and bling (although, chocolate and bling are NEVER a bad thing).

Love is . . . sitting up all night with a sick child.

Love is . . . fixing fried chicken for dinner when you don’t like chicken, but your husband considers it a complete food group.

Love is . . . when your spouse goes out at 4am, in below zero weather to make sure there is enough fire wood inside the house before he leaves for the day.

Love is . . . finding a note from your child that says “World’s Greatest Mom”…..when you’ve acted like a lunatic that day.

The best wedding gift we received was the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.  If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend you pick up a copy.  My husband is a “words of affirmation” kind of guy.  He NEEDS to hear words of encouragement. I personally could care less in that are  (and struggle to give him those words he needs).  I, on the other hand, am an “acts of service” kind of gal.   Mop the floor and I feel the love, and likewise I show love by doing for others.   Both of our kids have different love languages as well.   We all have to be ever mindful to speak love to each other in the way that is best received by the individual.     Take time to discover the love language of each of your family members, and then show them you love them daily.

There’s and old story I heard, that fits pretty well here.   There was a couple who had been married for 50 years.  One day the woman looks at her husband and says “Why don’t you tell me you love me?”  The man looks at her for a moment and then responds with “I told you I loved you on the day we got married, if anything changes I’ll let you know!“  Obviously, the wife needed to HEAR his love.

Love is a verb.  It takes action and effort.   When you love someone, you naturally want to do things for that person.  You can do all the right things, and do it with the wrong attitude and accomplish nothing.  If you’re making your husband’s favorite meal, and griping about it all the time, and huffing and puffing while you eat…..I can assure you, he doesn’t feel the love, or enjoy the meal.    Love is a gift, not a burden.

Look for ways to show your family you love them daily.  It doesn’t have to be extravagant.   It doesn’t have to involve chocolate or bling, but it does have to come from your heart…and connect with their hearts.

The Beauty of White Space

As a writer, white space can be unnerving.   Looking at the blank page, or monitor as the case may be, can just make you feel so inadequate. What things do I have to say that can fill this page?   Will my words impact others for the good, or will they even know they’ve read the letters on the page?   Can I really put the depths of my heart into mere words for all to see? Some days, the words just.don’t.come.

When I first started scrapbooking I thought every page had to be a piece of art. Stunningly beautiful, telling stories with the photos and embellishments and all the stuff that IS scrapbooking.   I’d spend hours trying to get a single page to look just so, making sure there was no white space, because clearly that spoke of an unfinished layout.   Over time I’ve changed my mindset on this.   Now that I have two children’s lives to document, I have begun to embrace the white space, choosing rather to add little pops of color to contrast against the white space and draw the eye.

I’ve recently started to dabble in the world of art journaling.   I’m clearly out of my element here, because I have to draw and write and paint and…someone shoot me now.   I have an entire Pinterest board set aside specifically for art journaling.   As I look through these colorful, glitzy pins and see how others have swirled and collaged and layered, my mind seizes up with the fact that I can’t do all that.

But then…I see it. In all of those colorful journals and strikingly beautiful layouts, I see it. White space.   It is the white space that really makes the colors pop and become more noticeable. Even the tiniest amount of white space on a dazzling colorful page makes that page light up.

And, so it is with our lives.   It is the white space of our lives that make those red lipstick moments stand out.   It’s the white space of the 3am feedings and all night rocking with a sick child that illuminate the “Hi, Mom” when they find themselves in front of a TV camera.   It’s the white space of hours of late night prayer for a childless friend that shines into the pink and blue hues of a newborn layette years down the road. It is the white space of a listening ear and a nod of the head that bursts through to radiate the silvery hues of a widow as she talks about her lost love.

White space is not to be feared, it is a gift.   Embrace today’s white space in your life. Knowing that it is those ordinary days that give way to the sunrise of tomorrow.